Elise watched the ball drop, then walked into the bedroom. She took the ring off her finger and gently placed it in the back of her jewelry box next to the single earrings missing their mates and the necklace with the broken clasp she’d never gotten around to having repaired.
This was her life now. It had been two and a half months since the divorce was finalized.
Richard and Stephanie had already sent out the invitations to their Valentines Day wedding in Aruba. Obviously, she wasn’t invited. Elise only knew about it because their son Kevin let it slip he’d received an invitation.
Kevin had asked her what he should do. Should he go? He didn’t like Stephanie, but he loved his dad. She’d politely declined to comment knowing Richard would find a way to guilt him into going. She didn’t need the hassle of being accused of trying to turn his only son (for now) against him.
Elise wondered how many of their friends had been invited and how many would attend giving their tacit approval of the union and Richard’s behavior.
She looked at her finger. A faint circle of white marked the place her wedding ring lived for over twenty years. Fifteen very good years. The last five or so, not so much.
She closed the box and walked into the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth before going to bed. It was a new bed with a stylish black metal frame, new sheets, new pillows, and a new mattress and box springs. She’d even placed it in a new spot in the bedroom. Not that there were many spots it would fit. It wasn’t a large room. Still, a double bed took up much less space that a king.
Washing her hands felt strange. She stared at the white circle again.
Though she was tired, sleep proved elusive. Images of happier times ran on a loop before her eyes, whether open or closed. Elise tried to think of a reason she should feel relieved it was over and a new chapter could begin. Richard had moved on years ago, coming home for a visit every now and then. Not in the physical sense; he still lived there until, without warning, she received the divorce papers. He’d slept with her the night before, using up the last of her, then throwing her away.
“Be a Phoenix.”
She wasn’t sure, but she could hear those words as if someone were next to her whispering in her ear softly like a lover.
“Be a Phoenix.”
“How?”
She realized she’d asked the question out loud. Her voice breaking the stillness of being alone in a bed with only the sound of her own breathing.
“Rise from the ashes,” the voice whispered. “Be a Phoenix.”
She dreamed of flying with beautiful wings fashioned with feathers of every color. She could feel the air washing over her skin the slightest resistance on her face as she soared higher and higher. She gasped as she burst into flames her ashes falling to the ground.
Elise woke, fighting to pull air through her lungs, arms flailing trying to put out the flames before it was too late.
“It was only a dream.” She said aloud willing her breathing to return to normal. The alarm on her phone blared. Brunch, then shopping with Casey and Amy downtown. It had been their New Year’s Day ritual for almost 20 years.
Elise looked at her watch. Amy was picking Casey up first, then swinging by to collect her. She had almost two hours to shower, fix her hair, dress, and carefully apply her makeup.
She stood naked before the mirror looking for a flaw that might explain why Richard had felt the need or justification to stray.
Elise hadn’t “let herself go.” She’d been a runner most of her life almost qualifying for the Olympics while she was in college. Only a few hundredths of a second separated her from the last woman chosen. Almost. She never talked about it. She was one of many young women who had their hopes dashed that weekend, but she was the last to be cut. It still stung. When the next Olympic trials rolled around, she was pregnant with Kevin and chasing a new dream. People only heard about it if Richard mentioned it. He used to be proud of her, but sometime during the marriage, almost became not quite good enough, and his tone became mocking.
Richard leaving her for Stephanie and filing for the divorce were only reminders that once again, Elise hadn’t made the final cut. It was almost as painful as the infidelity.
“Be a Phoenix,“ she heard again.
She stood under the shower head willing the water to wash away the voice and the memories until it turned cold.
Elise removed her gloves after they were seated at the table. She heard a sharp intake of breath. She put her left hand in her lap and tried to ignore it. Amy quickly raised the drinks menu in front of her face.
“Well, I’m glad you finally took the damned thing off, Elise.” Casey said. Subtlety was never her strong suit.
Amy removed one of the brightly colored rings adorning her right hand.
“Here, this will look perfect with your outfit. You can keep it as long as you want.”
Until the reminder is gone.
She grabbed Elise’s hand and slipped the ring over the white circle.
“Perfect, and just in time.” She said
Elise glanced back over her shoulder, and she saw them immediately. Richard and Stephanie were being seated at a table for two near the buffet. Unless she walked completely around the perimeter of the dining room and cut back to the buffet she’d have to walk right past them.
“I made this reservation last January. How the heck did Richard get a table?” Casey fumed.
“Are you okay, Elise? Do you want to leave?”
Elise reached across the table and squeezed her friends’ hands. She looked down at the colorful stones now encircling her finger.
“I’m good.” She answered. “I’m a Phoenix. Now, let’s get some food before there’s a line.”
She rose from her seat and walked past Richard and Stephanie without glancing their way.