February is the month that highlights love. As we know, there are all kinds and depths of love; from the love of a beloved pet to the love of ourselves and others.
To me, gratitude is a form of love. The dictionary definition reads: the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. The media bombards us with pictures of others who are thinner taller, younger, prettier, richer, cooler, having more fun etc. It goes on and on.
Sometimes it is a struggle to love how we look or to appreciate what we have and our circumstances. It never seems enough and we can feel that we are never good enough.
I have Facebook friends who all seem to travel the world visiting exotic places. They send me pictures of amazing sunsets and shimmering lakes. I get letters at Christmas from friends whose children have accomplished amazing goals. Even though I am truly happy for the world travelers and the very successful children, I sit here with my 30 year old nonverbal son Joel, waiting for him to say Mom to me someday. Well today he managed to dress himself correctly. This accomplishment may not be Christmas letter worthy, but I am grateful and proud of his accomplish the same as I am proud of my friend's children.
Love month is a reminder to me and hopefully to all of you to show gratitude for what you do have. Joel was in the Life skills class at Upper Saint Clair high school. When I received his first report card in ninth grade, it was all A's. This pattern continued. At the end of each school year, we were invited to the high honors banquets at the high school. When the first invitation came, both my Aunt and my Mom told me to decline the invitation. They pointed out that Joel's A's were not the same as the regular students A's. I declined the invitation. The school called and reminded me that my son was doing his best and should be applauded for his efforts.
As a Mom of a special needs son, I am always worried that he will be discriminated against. I told the school that we would go but if anyone put him down then we would leave. Joel was applauded the same as the other high achievers. When he walked at graduation there was an asterisk by his name *Joel Petrusik, high honors.
Sometimes I have to dig deep to show gratitude for something my sons accomplish when I compare them to other people sons or to show gratitude for my situation when I see other people's circumstances. But this love month, and in all months, let's make a concerted effort to love ourselves and our families and friends for who we are and for what we have accomplished. Maybe next year I will send one of those Christmas letters and list all the things that I am grateful for, all the little things that make life lovely.
